Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize