so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize