Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
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No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
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I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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