so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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