Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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