yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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