i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize