I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize