Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
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And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
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Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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