Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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