she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize