Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
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Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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