dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
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The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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