I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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