Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize