is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
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