Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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