so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize