Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
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you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
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I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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