i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
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It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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