This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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