HIV tests are more positive than that guy
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
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I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
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I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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