Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(619): View more from California

Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.

(1-619): View more from California

i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!

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(619): Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning. (1-619): i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth! http://tfl.nu/6amj

Replies (9) Good night (1413) Bad night (411)
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(303): View more from Colorado

I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!

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(303): I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh! http://tfl.nu/2rr5

Replies (1) Good night (549) Bad night (1205) Order T-Shirt
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(847): View more from Illinois

chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.

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(847): chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc. http://tfl.nu/4h93

Replies (11) Good night (1866) Bad night (630) Order T-Shirt
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(770): View more from Georgia

I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?

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(770): I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward? http://tfl.nu/lg8a

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(631): View more from New York

woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?

(516): View more from New York

you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."

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(631): woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain? (516): you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food." http://tfl.nu/33sl

Replies (67) Good night (11422) Bad night (1190)
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(240): View more from Maryland

I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.

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(240): I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good. http://tfl.nu/bq51

Replies (98) Good night (27340) Bad night (1732)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.

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(973): random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question. http://tfl.nu/ra0q

Replies (17) Good night (6155) Bad night (1045) Order T-Shirt
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(908): View more from New Jersey

do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?

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(908): do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants? http://tfl.nu/rdvq

Replies (9) Good night (2685) Bad night (931) Order T-Shirt
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(505): View more from New Mexico

Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.

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(505): Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower. http://tfl.nu/q0tv

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.

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(+44): I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland. http://tfl.nu/8trz

Replies (5) Good night (2009) Bad night (711)
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(585): View more from New York

There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn

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(585): There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn http://tfl.nu/f3ez

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(415): View more from California

The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.

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(415): The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures. http://tfl.nu/exb9

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(206): View more from Washington

View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.

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(206): View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well. http://tfl.nu/3wj0

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(907): View more from Alaska

I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.

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(907): I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream. http://tfl.nu/8o4c

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(802): View more from Vermont

There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking

(1-802): View more from Vermont

Omg so it's educational?

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(802): There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking (1-802): Omg so it's educational? http://tfl.nu/zo1h

Replies (2) Good night (490) Bad night (95) Order T-Shirt

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