I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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