i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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