dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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