marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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