took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
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