just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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