I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize