Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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