dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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