I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
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