My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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