you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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