New low: just hacked my moms facebook
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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