so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize