and i looked up. we had an audience...
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize