I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
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i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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