i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
it's like iHOP with fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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