I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize