Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
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