What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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