Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(515): View more from Iowa

Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?

(847): View more from Illinois

Beat you to it.

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(515): Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card? (847): Beat you to it. http://tfl.nu/fyxy

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(248): View more from Michigan

If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.

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(248): If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would. http://tfl.nu/psvg

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(562): View more from California

CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!

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(562): CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?! http://tfl.nu/fpdj

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(+26): View more from

Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY

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(+26): Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY http://tfl.nu/9qwj

Replies (30) Good night (7097) Bad night (2361) Order T-Shirt
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.

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(717): He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping. http://tfl.nu/p29z

Replies (27) Good night (1140) Bad night (4445) Order T-Shirt
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(647): View more from Ontario

it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me

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(647): it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me http://tfl.nu/r4c5

Replies (39) Good night (7633) Bad night (1301) Order T-Shirt
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(616): View more from Michigan

We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.

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(616): We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks. http://tfl.nu/giz7

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(205): View more from Alabama

You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.

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(205): You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you. http://tfl.nu/htvc

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(613): View more from Ontario

I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.

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(613): I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another. http://tfl.nu/23d2

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(270): View more from Kentucky

you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.

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(270): you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you. http://tfl.nu/d78n

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.

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(978): I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters. http://tfl.nu/m77a

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(443): View more from Maryland

My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.

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(443): My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love. http://tfl.nu/12sb

Replies (8) Good night (3455) Bad night (473)
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(810): View more from Michigan

She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.

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(810): She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room. http://tfl.nu/nven

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(402): View more from Nebraska

He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.

(1-402): View more from Nebraska

Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.

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(402): He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is. (1-402): Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors. http://tfl.nu/lcrs

Replies (6) Good night (1585) Bad night (392)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale

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(304): I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale http://tfl.nu/3k6s

Replies (7) Good night (1711) Bad night (367) Order T-Shirt

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