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put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
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