thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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