tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His hands were made for my vagina.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Terrible idea I love it
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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