I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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