Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
There was a lot of him and a little penis
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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