I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize